When a divorcing couple have children most people will assume the mother will receive custody. This doesn’t have to be the case though - as many women are not appropriate role models for their children, nor may be able to handle financial aspects of raising them. Of course this is also true of fathers and it will come down to some pretty basic facts.

First and foremost what is best for the children is always considered If both parents are capable providers as well as nurturing and loving parents, then either would make a good choice. Asking what the children want should be a priority and an important aspect of deciding on custody. The child might prefer to stay with the mother especially if she retains the family home. Or if the child is closer to their father - he might make the right choice. The child should always have some say in where they will live.

Parents who do not have much involvement in their children’s lives will not normally receive custody from a judge. The courts are unwilling to take a child away from the parent who has been a constant in that child’s life and give them to one who they barely know or see. If a parent who has not been involved much in their child’s life wants custody, then they must be prepared to make some changes to their life. They must become more active and spend time with their children. They must show the courts as well as the child they are willing and able to be there for the child.

Children should not be exposed to unhealthy environments. If one parent is in a relationship or has had multiple relationships - the courts will be less willing to grant custody. It is not wise to subject children to romantic companions too early, especially if the parents are still going through the divorce process.

Putting down the other parent in front of the children and in court is a sure fire way to make sure the courts do not grant custody. The courts consider this as a means of hurting the child’s relationship with the other parent and will take into account if that parent will prevent the child from seeing the other parent.

Parents who have visitation at least until the final court hearing should always be on time when they are picking up or dropping off their child. The courts will look down on the practice of being habitually late and see this as a sign that custody is not that important to them. Being flexible to each other’s schedule is a good idea too, for example if one parent must switch visitation to a different weekend or day.

Parents need to be willing to prove they want custody and would be good parents. Having everything documented and knowing when events occurred goes a long way to proving this to the courts.

Custody is an important part of the divorce process and if handled properly, all parties should be happy with the arrangements.